Zoomdoggle: More fun than work!

You gotta go where the herd goes. Sometimes that means the snack-food isle. How fun is that?

LINK: via Buzzfeed.

Of the 20+ emails I get in response to yesterday’s Douchebag post (doesn’t anyone comment anymore?), one in particular caught my eye. Elianna points out that one of the bits she misses most about my old blog is seeing the pictures I’ve taken. Pictures of fun stuff. Fair enough. Here’s a good start, about a week ago, the lovely Kristina and I went on a hot air balloon ride…

NOTE: This is the same hot air balloon ride that Ford paid for months back, only, I couldn’t go because the Fiesta had been “stolen.” Other fun bits of trivia, when you pay for a ride, you’re buying the air time (an hour of flight in this case), not the distance you do. That’s because the balloon pretty much just goes wherever the wind takes it. When the time is up, it then lands, pretty much wherever it is. In this case, that meant touching down on some guy’s lawn at 7:30AM. He was fairly understanding, even as a four wheel drive vehicle had to be driven across his lawn to retrieve it. Tons more pictures after the jump.

LINK: Facebook.

Paste any text into the Haiku finder and it pulls out sentences whose words fall in groups of 5, 7, 5 syllables. Get it? There’s poetry in just about anything. How fun is that? Have a go, and if you find something good (maybe Kanye’s interruption was more artful than you realized) let us know.

EDITOR’S NOTE: I’ve been plugging things in for the last 10 minutes or so – everything from yesterday’s Douchebag post to the Declaration Of Independence – so far, no Haiku found. What gives?

LINK: Haikufinder. Many thanks to Markski for sending this frustrating yet promising site my way.

“Turns out size does matter,” writes reader Carolyn Murphy, “the bigger ones are more fun.” Er, ok.

LINK: Urbanoutfitters. Thanks CM for the tip. Punny how you wrote it.

Explore the cave, collect weapons, and bash stuff. Sure, there’s more to it, but that third bit is the fun part. Click the pic to make the jump.

LINK: Armorgames.

Lets me see if I’ve got this right, all it takes is a balloon a $150 a prepaid cellphone to beam your own pictures back from the edge of our atmosphere? Leave it to the geniuses at MIT. Full details, instructions, how-to, along with loads of pictures and data after the jump.

LINK: 1337arts.

A real live mascot… yup, good times.

LINK: via Buzzfeed.

Only one site lets you know in real time. How many and where they’re at. How fun is that?

LINK: Howmanypeopleareinspacerightnow.

Bringing the spam problem to the real world, the Spanish group Left Hand Rotation made postcards with the SPAM logo, handed them out on the street and stuffed them in mailboxes… all unsolicited of course. Have a look.

LINK: Lefthandrotation via Urbanprankster.

It all started with an argument between me and my Buckybuddy Craig. I called him a dick, he called me a douche. Nothing new there really, we have similar discussions about each other’s foibles almost daily (you can set your watch to it actually, it’s how I know it’s time for lunch). Yesterday however, he pointed out something interesting: While it was just me calling him a dick, the whole of the Internet seems to be in agreement over my douchery. No really, take a second to mull it over. A simple google search of my name along with the word “douche” returns thousands of results. And most of the first page actually refers to me. For example:

1. In 2005, I decided it might be fun to free a fish (a real live fish – all 25lbs of him) from a Chinese grocery store and release him into the wild. So I did. It was fun. Some people found it inspiring. Some people not. Many anonymous commenters called me a douche.

2. Later that year, following an appearance on G4′s Attack Of The Show, I posted a story about how/why that appearance got me fired from FHM… to which a commenter named “Pomp” said: “I thought you were a douche on AOTS, but not because of anything you said.” Good to know.

3. Remember when I figured out how to take laser finger pictures? Fun, right? Tim Giachetti noticed (in reference to me): “The expression on his face says, “Total club kid douche.” What a retard, hope his head explodes from eating X.” I never realized I was so expressive.

4. Remember when I tried to force a missed connection? Regarding that one, “Babyhiter” wrote: “This dude is a douche. he doesn’t care about love. all he cares about is getting some wookie on his wookie.”

5. And then there was the time I thought the Fiesta Ford had lent me was stolen. “SuperSedanMan” noticed something interesting (again, about my face):”Lol, poor guy, he is getting screwed. But than again, his face has “douche” written all over it. He looks like he should be driving and import, and singing with Justin Timberlake.”

6. Thanking customer service? Nothing wrong with that, right? But Anthony called me a “Danecookian level douche” while Jake D thought I was more of a “douche canoe.”

Keep in mind, these are all people who don’t know me but have somehow all come to the same conclusion. And what Craig doesn’t know is how many times I had to delete shockingly similar commentary from my old blog. So I guess it’s settled. Craig wins that round, but now I’m looking to you Internet… any idea how to un-douche? Short of that, any idea where I can find some hot chicks to take pictures with?