DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME (or do)
Last night was URDB (my favorite website on Earth, second only to this one)’s monthly meeting of the World Record Appreciation Society. As always, it was loads of fun (and free chicken tenders – yum!). At there top, we have a gentlemen doing “the most sexual innuendos said to a squirrel in a minute (none of them using the words “nuts”). Next up, “most ties around the neck at once.” And of course, the ever popular record for “the most pictures of fish sandwiches looked at in one minute” was also once again set by Mr Lamb.
As for me, well, you might have noticed I’m a bit out of it today. Here’s the reason why: Last night, in a stirring tribute to Super Troopers, one of my favorite movies of all time, I set the world record the “fastest drinking of a bottle of syrup directly from the bottle.” I murdered in a medium-sized Jemima in just over 2 minutes (video to come).
Sure, I make it look easy, but know that she put up a good fight. With minutes of tasting victory (and fake buttery flavor galore), and accepting my patch, I began the empty the contents of my stomach (see you later chicken fingers) into a bag. Bag number 2, started a half-hour or so later, was mostly the good stuff. Today I’m pretty much peeing snot. It’s not recommended that you try to top this one… unless you truly have the heart of a champion.
LINK: URDB.
February 12th, 2009 at 1:01 pm
congratulations!! would you like some ego waffles now?
February 12th, 2009 at 1:23 pm
That’s gross. You’re amazing, but that’s gross. And I saw when you first mentioned it on your Twitter too, but never thought… well, you know.
February 12th, 2009 at 1:23 pm
“Peeing snot” is such a horrible visual.
February 12th, 2009 at 1:24 pm
“The snozberries taste like snazberries.” Super Troopers is my favorite too.
February 12th, 2009 at 3:58 pm
It’s your long suffering girlfriend I feel sorry for!
Gross.
Grosser than my attempt at gross:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v1xvDDpRQA0
February 12th, 2009 at 4:18 pm
And then promptly threw up?
February 12th, 2009 at 4:52 pm
::stunnage:: please say you have video of everything.
this gig puts your cupcakes to shame.
February 12th, 2009 at 5:58 pm
I really don’t get the point of this unless the patch is really cool?
February 12th, 2009 at 8:43 pm
The video is coming. Jake’s performance was tremendous. I was proud to share the stage with him.
February 12th, 2009 at 8:54 pm
i think i’d rather drink real maple syrup than the fake stuff. Jake, what are those tattoos you have on your wrists?
February 18th, 2009 at 7:01 pm
jakemas, you rule.